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52 Week Challenge

Week Thirty-Eight: Develop Your Dream

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Welcome back to the Remodel Your Reality Challenge! One of the most powerful exercises in coaching is to ask people to visualize their ideal life – to literally see what their life would look like if everything were exactly perfect according to their values, desires, dreams and purpose – and then begin the process of creating a plan to achieve that life. This exercise is powerful for two reasons: First, it helps people identify the concrete differences between where they are and where they want to be. And second, it opens them up to the reality that they have the choice to pursue that ideal vision instead of just going with the flow and taking whatever comes their way.

Without the prompting of a coach, however, most people never do this. Instead, they focus on getting through the day or surviving the week. They react to the circumstances of their lives, feeling a vague sense of dissatisfaction and an overwhelming busyness, which stops them from seriously looking at how they’re experiencing each day. As a result, they live by default.

A balanced life is, in essence, a designed life. It is a life that has been clearly crafted, carefully nurtured, and intentionally acted upon. The process of making your dreams come true involves staying focused on what you want, identifying where you are now, and creating a plan of action that includes results, actions, and resources. Without this process, you are at the mercy of life’s currents. But through it, you can free yourself from the tyranny of random fate and take control of the direction of your life as you sail toward your destiny.

One Thing To Think About

The life of your dreams is possible and within reach. Anything you can imagine has the potential to become part of your reality, but first you must imagine it!

One Question To Answer

Do you live by design or default? How long has it been since you sat down with your dreams and structured your ideal life?

One Challenge To Take

  1. Where in your life have you made the decision to identify and intentionally pursue your dreams?
  2. What parts of your life are primarily directed by reaction, chance and outside influences?
  3. How satisfied are you with the life areas in Question 1? How satisfied are you with the life areas in Question 2?

Take Care of You!

Kim

Week Thirty-Seven: The Passion Triad: Step Into Your Purpose

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Welcome back to the Remodel Your Reality Challenge! There are many misconceptions about life purpose in our society. Invariably, people think that finding their purpose means discovering their perfect career—but purpose is so much more than that! Purpose has little to do with what you do. It has everything to do with who you are and how you do everything you do.

You have been uniquely gifted with a specific combination of aptitudes and a predisposition to special interests and emotions. These are your strengths and your values. When you offer these gifts in the form of service, you make a contribution to your fellow man. Like your DNA, your strengths and values form a structure unique to you. This means that you are uniquely qualified to make a contribution to your world that only you can make.

Another misconception about life purpose is that it must be related to a huge undertaking, such as discovering a new world, curing the sick, or feeding the hungry. For some people, their unique strengths and values may call them to serve in this way. But for most of us, living purposefully is based on how we approach the routine and seemingly small things we do each day.

Connecting with your purpose does not have to turn your world on its ear. It does not require massive sacrifice or suffering. It simply requires a shift in your perspective, recognition for what has always been within you, and a willingness to offer those gifts in service.

One Thing To Think About

The key to stepping into your purpose rests in your willingness to intentionally apply your strengths and values in service each day. When you deliberately approach your day looking for ways to apply and experience your gifts and values, you will be rewarded with a passionate, purposeful life experience, even when you’re dealing with difficult issues.

One Question To Answer

In what ways are you using your strengths and values to serve others? Where is this not happening in your life? How do you feel about your answers?

One Challenge To Take

The recipe for stepping into your purpose is: strengths + values x service = passionate, purposeful living.

  1. List your strengths.
  2. List your values.
  3. What are some specific opportunities you might have to offer service using your values and strengths?

To live purposefully, you must seek opportunities to offer your strengths and values each day. Remember that your offering need not be grand. The power of your passion will be unleashed through simple action.

Take Care of You!

Kim

Week Thirty-Six: The Passion Triad: Integrate Your Values

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Welcome back to the Remodel Your Reality Challenge! In the coaching world, values are referred to as those qualities or interests that you’re naturally drawn to. They’re the realities of life you truly appreciate and are key markers along the road to passion.

Your values come from two sources: What you feel strongly about, and what you are attracted to. When you reconnect with the emotions and interests that are innately and excitingly important to you, your world becomes rich and your purpose becomes clear. You begin to approach life differently, and you respond to situations with greater perspective. You set goals with more clarity and embrace success with an enhanced level of happiness, acceptance, and appreciation.

How do you rediscover your emotional experience and identify the things that attract you? You begin paying attention to the signals you get from your body. Perhaps when you’re excited you get a tingle up your spine or an acceleration of your heartbeat. You might feel butterflies in your stomach or a tickle in your throat. Everyone experiences feelings differently, but we all always encounter some physical sensation along with our emotions.

One Thing To Think About

Your values are expressions of your authenticity, and when you make room for them in your life, you ignite your passion.

One Question To Answer

What are you attracted to? The following questions can help you create your attraction profile.

  • What do you like to read?
  • How do you like to be entertained?
  • What are your favorite pastimes?
  • When do you feel most natural?
  • What could you teach?
  • What brings you joy?
  • What is the essence of what you identified?

One Challenge To Take

List your top ten values. Your values are attributes (like self-sufficient, peaceful, assertive, creative, or funny) that describe who you are, what’s important to you and what you put a priority on in life.

If you need some inspiration or ideas, you can find a values list in my book, Remodel Your Reality: Seven Steps to Rebalance Your Life and Reclaim Your Passion on pages 95 and 96.

Take Care of You!

Kim

Week Thirty-Five: The Passion Triad: Claim Your Strengths

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Welcome back to the Remodel Your Reality Challenge! One of the biggest mistakes people make in the area of personal development is focusing on their weaknesses. For some reason, people have bought into the notion that most of their energy should be directed at shoring up inadequacies instead of developing their natural gifts. But the fact is, when you focus on building your strengths instead, the power of those attributes eclipses your weaknesses naturally.

I’m not suggesting that you avoid acknowledging your weaknesses or shy away from learning new skills or information. I am reminding you that no one is good at everything, yet everyone is good at something!

Claiming your strengths is the first factor in the passion triad. As you become clear about your gifts, you will naturally seek opportunities to apply them. This action pulls you into a cycle of success, with each strength-based accomplishment contributing priceless deposits to your self-confidence account. This shift, in and of itself, is incredibly powerful.

One Thing To Think About

Your strengths are actually hardwired in your brain. You are literally born to be good at certain things, and each of us is born with a unique lineup and combination of specific attributes. Rather than attempting to reverse your biology, why not invest in maximizing the gifts you’ve been given?

One Question To Answer

What qualities do you respect and admire in yourself? What characteristics do others acknowledge you for? What are you naturally good at?

One Challenge To Take

The first step in awakening and unleashing your passion involves committing your focus to the naming and claiming of your strengths.

  1. Identify Your Strengths: Write down your ten greatest strengths. You can identify these qualities on your own, look up a list of strengths in a self-help book or website, or ask two or three close friends or family whom you trust and who care about you to tell you what they believe your strengths are.
  2. Claim Your Strengths: For each of the strengths you’ve identified, recall at least one accomplishment or contribution you’ve made as a result of using that strength. If you can think of more than one example, that’s great. At a minimum, identify one example for each of your strengths. You can come up with these on your own, or ask someone close to you for help.

Take care of you!

Kim

Week Thirty-Four: Light Your Fire: The Passion Triad

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Welcome back to the Remodel Your Reality Challenge! We all want to feel passion—that intensely charged arousal that makes our heart beat faster and causes us to lose track of time. In fact, one of the first things many of my coaching clients want to accomplish is to reconnect with their passion and purpose.

But how do you rouse and reconnect with those feelings of attraction, interest, infatuation, anticipation, and enthusiasm? Reconnecting with your passion is a three-step process. You do it by:

  • Claiming your strengths. Your strengths are the natural abilities or aptitudes that are unique to you. The first step in awakening and unleashing your passion involves committing your focus to the naming and claiming of your strengths.
  • Integrating your values. Your values are those qualities or interests that you’re naturally drawn to or that you appreciate. Identifying and integrating your values is the second step in re-igniting your passion.
  • Stepping into your purpose. You begin to live passionately when you intentionally combine your strengths with your values and offer those gifts to others in the form of service each day.

One Thing To Think About

Passion is your heart’s recognition that you are in the midst of something native to your authentic self. In essence, your passion is ignited when you reconnect with what you were made to do and who you were made to be. The intense joy associated with living passionately is a direct result of living authentically.

One Question To Answer

How long has it been since you took on the day with unbridled enthusiasm? Can you recall the last time you experienced intense excitement or pure joy? Are you a passionate person? If so, what are you passionate about? If not, are you ready to heat things up?

One Challenge To Take

We will discuss each of the three steps in detail in the next few posts. But understanding the nuts and bolts of strength, values, and purposeful service will only take you halfway down the road of passion. You complete your journey when you commit to adopting this intentional approach to living.

Fortunately, completion is very simple. You only need to define your recipe for success and dedicate yourself to creating opportunities to experience your purposeful delicacy each day. Your recipe goes like this: strengths + values x service = passionate, purposeful living.

For today, I want you to think about your life as it is now. How well does your life give you the opportunity to use your strengths, live your values and serve your purpose? Answer this question by rating each statement below from 1 to 5, with 1 being Not At All and 5 being To The Fullest Extent.

 

  1. I am able to demonstrate and use my strengths to their best advantage in every aspect of my life.

1                      2                      3                      4                      5

 

  1. My lifestyle and choices reflect my values – the feelings, priorities and beliefs that are most important to me.

1                      2                      3                      4                      5

 

  1. I feel that my life serves my highest purpose – I am able to combine my strengths and values and use them to serve others.

1                      2                      3                      4                      5

 

Take care of you!

Kim

Week Thirty-Three: Beliefs About Abundance

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Welcome back to the Remodel Your Reality Challenge! Your beliefs about abundance determine what you’re willing to go for and what you’ll allow yourself to have. Typically, these beliefs manifest when talking about money and success. For example, if you hold a belief that wealthy people must be dishonest and don’t believe yourself to be dishonest, you will undermine your ability to create wealth. And if you think that professionally successful people have to sacrifice their families to be successful and believe it’s wrong to do so, you will sabotage your efforts toward professional growth and achievement.

One Thing To Think About

The truth is, life is filled with abundance. There is no shortage of any good thing in this world. Yet, if you grew up with messages about scarcity or witnessed the rejection of accomplished people, it’s quite possible you’ve developed a set of unhealthy beliefs about the availability or consequences of abundance.

One Question To Answer

Do you believe there is enough wealth and success to go around? Do you think that people who have a lot in their lives must be dishonest or must have to work harder than you’re willing to work? Have you invested yourself in the false notion that for you to win someone else has to lose?

One Challenge To Take

  1. Identify one empowering belief you have about abundance.
  2. How has that belief served you in your life and work?
  3. Now, identify one disempowering belief you have about abundance.
  4. For each belief, ask yourself the following:
  • Identify it – Write the belief down.
  • Define it – What is supporting this belief? What experiences are you using to prove the belief?
  • Disprove it – Are your proof points really valid? What else could they mean?
  • Shift it – How could you improve upon this need, so that it serves you? What proof points could you use to support it?

Until next time, take care!

Kim

Week Thirty-Two: Beliefs About Love

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Welcome back to the Remodel Your Reality Challenge! The experiences you had as a child formed your love beliefs. If you grew up in an affectionate family, or if your family was very expressive and communicated feelings of love through words, you may feel most loved when you’re being treated affectionately or when someone tells you they love you. Conversely, if you received no such messages as a child, you may doubt your own lovability. If you grew up with a parental model of a healthy marriage, you probably developed empowering beliefs about relationships, whereas if you grew up with an unhealthy or dysfunctional marriage model, it’s likely you’ll question the value of marriage or the possibility of happy-couple-dom.

One Thing To Think About

If you believe you are good and worthy of love, you will be much more likely to attract healthy people into your life and expect a high standard of treatment from them. Your faith in people will cause you to look for the genuine goodness in each person in your life, and this will allow you to have high-quality connections.

Conversely, if you have doubts about your own deservingness of love or you mistrust people, you probably have some unhealthy beliefs about love and relationships. These beliefs could cause you to live in fear of abandonment or prompt you to be suspicious of your partner. Not only is this environment detrimental to building a quality union, it can wreak havoc on your emotional stability.

One Question To Answer

Do you believe you’re lovable? In your mind, is there such a thing as soul mates? What has your experience with commitment taught you about marriage and relationships?

One Challenge To Take

  1. Identify one empowering belief you have about love.
  2. How has that belief served you in your life and work?
  3. Now, identify one disempowering belief you have about love.
  4. For each belief, ask yourself the following:
  • Identify it – Write the belief down.
  • Define it – What is supporting this belief? What experiences are you using to prove the belief?
  • Disprove it – Are your proof points really valid? What else could they mean?
  • Shift it – How could you improve upon this need, so that it serves you? What proof points could you use to support it?

Until next time, take care!

Kim

Week Thirty-One: Beliefs About People

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Welcome back to the Remodel Your Reality Challenge! The truth you hold about people governs your interaction with them. Do you believe people are kind, or do you think they’ll hurt you? Do you have specific beliefs about men, women, or people of a certain race or culture?

The authenticity within you knows that people do the best they can with what they know. She believes in the goodness and equality of people and knows we’re all connected and looking for the same things in life—love, acceptance, fulfillment, meaning, comfort, and a sense of purpose.

However, there is another part of you, based in fear, that distrusts people’s motives and encourages you to protect yourself from getting too close to others. She causes you to question those who look or think differently from you and invites you to separate yourself from others, focusing on your differences rather than your commonality.

One Thing To Think About

When you believe in the goodness of people, you open yourself to true intimacy. When you allow fear to reside over your beliefs, you’ll likely invest your emotional energy in protecting yourself. It’s very difficult to develop and nurture a genuine bond when part of you is posturing for safety. Ultimately, this undermines your ability to meet your need for connection and leads to feelings of isolation and loneliness.

One Question To Answer

Which of these two influences – trust or distrust of other people – will you allow to dictate your reality?

One Challenge To Take

  1. Identify one empowering belief you have about people.
  2. How has that belief served you in your life and work?
  3. Now, identify one disempowering belief you have about people.
  4. For each belief, ask yourself the following:
  • Identify it – Write the belief down.
  • Define it – What is supporting this belief? What experiences are you using to prove the belief?
  • Disprove it – Are your proof points really valid? What else could they mean?
  • Shift it – How could you improve upon this need, so that it serves you? What proof points could you use to support it?

Until next time, take care!

Kim

Week Thirty: Beliefs About Self

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Welcome back to the Remodel Your Reality Challenge! Do you believe you’re a good person, or are you unsure of yourself? Are you willing to be authentic in your interactions with others, expecting to be accepted, or do you believe you’re flawed in some way? Do you see yourself as intelligent and capable, and confident that you can accomplish the goals you set out to achieve? Or do you doubt your ability to impact your life, making changes once you commit to something?

Your self-beliefs dictate what you will attempt and how fully you’ll allow yourself to participate in life. They govern how much love you will allow yourself to receive and the quality of connection you’re able to establish with others. A conviction in your own goodness and capacity for accomplishment acts as a grounding foundation for your existence, allowing you to pursue your dreams and create rich relationships. Conversely, buying into beliefs that you’re not smart enough, not capable enough, or flawed in some way undermines your ability to stand strong in your being.

One Thing To Think About

When you believe there is something wrong with you, your energy will be invested in hiding this truth. You’ll live in fear, not joy. You’ll avoid getting close to others, because you’ll fear their reaction once they get to know the real you, and you’ll avoid pursuing your dreams out of a secret fear that you’ll fail and be found out for the fraud you fear you are.

You must establish a solid belief in your goodness, deservingness, and competence in order to stand strong in life. As you make the investment in developing and nurturing empowering self-beliefs, you will experience a new vitality, which you can then channel into creating success, happiness, and fulfillment.

One Question To Answer

What do you believe about yourself? Are you competent? Are you a good person who deserves great things? What do you fear about yourself? Where are you holding yourself back? Where might you need to shift your beliefs?

One Challenge To Take

  1. Identify one empowering belief you have about yourself.
  2. How has that belief served you in your life and work?
  3. Now, identify one disempowering belief you have about yourself.
  4. For each belief, ask yourself the following:
  • Identify it – Write the belief down.
  • Define it – What is supporting this belief? What experiences are you using to prove the belief?
  • Disprove it – Are your proof points really valid? What else could they mean?
  • Shift it – How could you improve upon this need, so that it serves you? What proof points could you use to support it?

Until next time, take care!

Kim

Week Twenty-Nine: Beliefs About Life

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Welcome back to the Remodel Your Reality Challenge! What do you believe about life? Is it a game, meant to be played and enjoyed? Is it a school, ripe with opportunity for learning? Is it a struggle, filled with hardships and strife? Whatever you believe will dictate the way you approach and experience every day of your existence.

For example, someone who believes that life is a precious gift that should be lived to its fullest will see and experience a vastly different reality than someone who believes life is filled with suffering and is to be endured rather than enjoyed – even if they have the same background, opportunities and options.

One Thing To Think About

While you may not have the ability to control all the circumstances of your life, you are solely responsible for managing what things mean to you. You can choose to empower yourself with positive messages, looking for the good in each day, or you can invest yourself in a defeatist attitude. Whatever you choose to believe, you will be right—because your beliefs become your reality.

One Question To Answer

How long has it been since you’ve stopped to consider what being alive means to you? Which of your life beliefs limits you? Which opens your world up to possibility? Where might you need to make a shift?

One Challenge To Take

  1. Identify one empowering belief you have about life.
  2. How has that belief served you in your life and work?
  3. Now, identify one disempowering belief you have about life.
  4. For each belief, ask yourself the following:
  • Identify it – Write the belief down.
  • Define it – What is supporting this belief? What experiences are you using to prove the belief?
  • Disprove it – Are your proof points really valid? What else could they mean?
  • Shift it – How could you improve upon this need, so that it serves you? What proof points could you use to support it?

Until next time, take care!

Kim