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Kimberly Fulcher

Change Could Do You Good

By Community Podcasts No Comments

Change is a Destination, You’ll Need a Mode of Transportation

Ponder Cheryl Crow’s song, “A Change Would Do You Good” and David Bowie’s “Changes.” Think about the challenges of change and the ever-present fact that even when we desire it beyond all else, we fight its coming tooth and nail. Contemplate the sometimes excruciating conflict that wages, external and internal, between status quo and imagined realities and the battles we wage with ourselves and others to hold back the tides of change.

In this episode of “That Got Me Thinking,” Ellie Newman is joined by empowerment expert, Kim Fulcher. Kim is a seasoned Silicon Valley executive and serial entrepreneur.  She’s the author of Remodel Your Reality™; Seven Steps to Rebalance Your Life and Reclaim Your Passion and the creator of the Get Your Groove Back ™ an on-demand coaching program for women.  She speaks professionally about empowerment, engagement, marketing and community culture, and runs a coaching organization that specializes in helping professional women succeed in their careers.

Kim offers practical advice for clarifying what you want, getting unstuck and effectively and efficiently facilitating change. She reminds us that we can’t behave in ways that conflict with what we want and still hope for new results. She encourages us to match our behavior with the goals we are looking to bring into our lives. She defines power as what you do rather than something you have or don’t have. And if you are serious about facilitating change,  you’ll need to use your power in practical ways – acquiring agency- utilizing your power intentionally to impact your life and shift it in the direction you desire.

Her advice is straight forward and achievable: To change, identify what’s working, assess what’s not working and then determine exactly what you want to have instead. There will be a number of things you will need to start doing and a similar number of things you will need to stop doing. Four simple steps will get you where you want to go: Acknowledge your Status Quo. Disrupt your current circumstance. Make adjustments toward your new destination.  And lean into your new normal.

How To Navigate Change

By Get Motivated, Get Your Groove Back 8 Comments

Empowered lives have one thing in common. They all require change. As a life coach, I’ve helped clients make personal and professional changes for more than 15 years, and I’ve come to believe that change itself is a little bit like an earthquake. (Which most of us prefer to avoid.) Some shifts are little. Some are seismic. All of them shake you right to your core.
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How to Get Unstuck

By Figure It Out 6 Comments

If you’re human, you’ve probably been stuck a time or two. (In fact, if you’re reading this, there’s a good bet you’re stuck on something right now.) Being in that sticky place feels like quicksand, doesn’t it? The more you struggle, the further you seem to sink, but you can’t stop thrashing around.

Stuck is exhausting, because it puts you in constant emotional motion, but you’re not actually getting anywhere (except deeper in the quicksand pit). Even worse, stuck comes with it’s own playlist of dark emotions.

In the beginning, you might be frustrated, impatient, or indignant. Eventually, after fighting stuck for a while, you transition to feeling angry, sad, resigned, and possibly even hopeless.

Stuck-ness involves struggle and repetition. Maybe you’re having the same argument over and over again with an important person in your life, where you talk the problem to death, but can’t seem to solve it. Or the same kind of person could be showing up in in your life again and again, derailing you with their drama and distraction.

You could be in the worst of stuck, where you’ve fallen into a self-defeating pattern. This is the stuck where you’re doing something that isn’t good for you or your life. You know your behavior is in conflict with what you want for yourself. But you keep doing it anyway.

Maybe you’re spending money you don’t have, or procrastinating and avoiding doing what needs to be done. You could be self-harming. Maybe you’re drinking or popping a pill to numb out, pounding bags of Doritos to comfort yourself, or confusing sex with love. Every morning you vow you won’t do whatever your “it” is again, but you do. Again. And again. And again.

That (of course) makes you feel so bad about yourself that you need a little something to numb or comfort again, so you go right back to what you said you wouldn’t do. It’s a vicious cycle on perpetual repeat.

Would you be interested if I told you I had a formula you could use to get un-stuck? I’ve used it myself (for some doozies) and as a life coach for women I’ve taught many of my clients how to use it for themselves.

No matter how bad things are right now, or how long you’ve been dealing with your problem or self-defeating pattern, I want you to know you can change it. You don’t have to live with stuck. You are way bigger than that.

Let’s do this, shall we? In this week’s episode of GrooveTV, I’ll give you 3 steps to get un-stuck once and for all. Press PLAY already. Sticky is icky. Read More

How To Get Motivated

By Get Motivated, Get Your Groove Back 2 Comments

You know that thing you want? (It’s the one you keep fantasizing about and wishing for.) You can have it. You really can, and it will be just as fantastic as you keep imagining. There’s a catch. (Of course.) You can’t think your way into a fantasy-come-true life. You have to behave your way there. You have to live for the life you want. (I can show you how to do that. Keep reading.)

The unpleasant truth about lost dreams is that most people don’t have what they want because they aren’t willing to do what needs to be done to have it. (Ouch, right?) Big accomplishments ask for big behavior. They require your engagement, your effort, and your consistency.

To have what you want, you’re going to need to do some things you don’t want to do. (Probably a lot of them actually.) You’re also going to be uncomfortable more times than you can count. You’re going to have to stretch and grow. While that’s simple (if somewhat unpleasant) to understand, it’s not an easy thing to do. Motivation can help you do it.

Motivation is an energy that helps you buckle down and do what needs to be done (even when you REALLY don’t want to do it). Motivation is an internal fuel that pushes you through blocks, and pulls you into those fantasies-come-true I mentioned earlier. You CAN have your dream life. Motivation can help you claim it, and in our current episode of GrooveTV we’re gonna get you some. Press PLAY already. Your mojo is waiting. ☺

We’ll handle this in three simple steps. (Like always.) Here we go…

Step 1 – Be the girl who goes for it.

There comes a time in every woman’s life, where she needs to decide who she’s going to be, what she’s going to stand for, and what kind of life she’s going to build. Perhaps you’re reading this blog right now, because this is THAT time for you.

Will you tap into the courage and strength within you, and create a life you’re proud of? Will you let yourself be all that you’re capable of becoming? Will you set boundaries and use your voice? Will you risk, and be vulnerable? Will you let yourself be BIG, and use your life?

Please say yes.
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Jumpstart Your Confidence

By Get Your Groove Back 2 Comments

What would you do if you felt more confident? Would you start that business you’ve been dreaming about, change jobs, or ask for a raise? Would you use the word “no” more often, stop people pleasing, or start speaking your mind?

If you weren’t hanging out with self-doubt, would you stop playing small and talking yourself out of going for things? Would you wear your ambition with pride, and collaborate with other women instead of feeling the need to compete with them?

While I haven’t had the opportunity to meet you personally, I’ve worked with enough women throughout my 15 years of professional coaching to know that your answer to these questions is YES.

Yes. If you felt confident you would say no more often. You would stop it with approval seeking, and start speaking up for yourself. You wouldn’t say yes when you mean no, and you’d give yourself permission to go for what you want. In fact, you’d celebrate the very act of going for things, and you’d look for ways to cooperate with other women while you did it.

While that sounds wonderful, it’s also (unfortunately) rare. Women aren’t typically taught how to behave with confidence. In fact, we’re often encouraged to question ourselves, and even given positive attention for playing the damsel in distress. (#nomoredamsels)

I share this not to discourage you, but to encourage you. If you’ve been hanging out with self-doubt more than self-confidence, there’s no reason to beat yourself up. You’re not alone, and you can turn your doubt around in a matter of days.

As it turns out, confidence is not something you think your way into. You have to behave your way there. While this might sound a little bit daunting, it’s actually great news because it puts you in the driver’s seat. You can grow your confidence right now. I’ll show you how in 3 simple steps. Read More

Know Your Worth. Then Live Like You Know It.

By Get Your Groove Back, Set Boundaries, Top Home Videos 18 Comments

What do you believe you deserve? That’s a pretty loaded question, isn’t it? In more than 15 years working as a women’s life coach, I’ve asked it thousands of times, and I’ve received countless answers. The majority of the responses have been disheartening, and they’ve revealed a startling truth. Women (even very successful, accomplished women) doubt their deservingness.

Deservingness is not to be confused with entitlement. Entitlement is about believing you have a right to something. Deservingness is about how much you believe you’re worth.

When you doubt your deservingness, what you’re really uncertain about is whether or not you measure up. Are you good enough? (YES.) You’ve made some pretty big mistakes. Do those bad blunders make you a bad person? (NO.) Are you a good enough person to deserve good things? (YES. YOU ARE.)

Many women carry around a secret shame that impacts their feelings of self-worth and deservingness. Our stories are individual, but our core experiences are very much the same. At some point in your life, someone told you there was something wrong with you. (This is inevitable, of course, because there’s something wrong with all of us.)

It gets to dangerous and disempowering territory through repetition. If even one person in your life tells you over and over again that there’s something wrong with you, well, you can start to believe them. Being rejected or criticized hurts, and it has a cumulative effect. Read More

How To Connect With Your Power

By Get Motivated No Comments

How to connect with your power.

What would you do if you felt powerful? Would you start that business you’ve been dreaming about, or ask for a raise? Would you use the word no more often, put an end to people pleasing, or start speaking your mind?

If you were feeling your mojo, what would you allow yourself to accomplish? Would you stop playing small and talking yourself out of going for things? Would you wear your ambition with pride, and collaborate with other women instead of feeling the need to compete with them?

While I haven’t had the opportunity to meet you personally, I’ve worked with enough women throughout my 15 years of professional coaching to know that your answer to these questions is YES.

Yes. If you felt powerful you would say no more often. You would stop it with approval seeking, and start speaking up for yourself. You wouldn’t say yes when you mean no, and you’d give yourself permission to go for what you want. In fact, you’d celebrate the very act of going for it, and you’d look for ways to cooperate and support your fellow sisters as they went for it too. (Totally awesome, right?)

You would do these things because when you’re centered in your own power, you show up to life as the best version of yourself. And let me tell you, the best version of you is a BADASS. When she takes charge of things, everything in your life improves.

Your career becomes more fulfilling and you start to succeed. Your relationships deepen and take on new dimensions. You get your financial house in order, and you become more confident. Your focus sharpens, your energy increases, and you begin to feel good in your own skin. You can live every day as the most empowered version of you. I’m here to show you how. Read More

How to set a boundary.

By Get Your Groove Back, Set Boundaries 4 Comments

With the holidays upon us, I thought it would be appropriate to have a discussion about boundaries. Because the truth of the matter is this. Your to-do list is about to birth holiday quadruplets, and your schedule now includes a ton of time with extended family. (And that is not always easy.)

Family is the source of so much love and support. It can also be the source of a great deal of angst and unnecessary drama. We’re all spoon fed this picture of holiday bliss and togetherness (especially now that we live in a social media age), but in my work as a life coach, I’ve found that family stories are a lot more complicated than that.

Everyone has a rulebook they use for life. Your rules tell you what’s okay, and what’s not okay. They guide your behavior, and they dictate what you expect from other people. This would work great if everyone played by the same rules, but (of course) that’s not how it works. People’s rules for life differ as much as people do.

When you think about rules in this way, it makes sense that gathering a large group of people together (even when they love each other) is going to result in some level of dysfunction and conflict, doesn’t it? While there’s little you can do to control the presence of challenging circumstances, you are totally in control of how you respond to them.

I want you to respond on purpose, so today I’m going to teach you how to set boundaries. A boundary is a behavioral fence. It helps you define limits for others, and it helps others define limits for you.

Hear me now. Relationships without boundaries do not work. They create misunderstandings, and breed resentment. (So it’s really important that you deal with setting boundaries, even if it makes you uncomfortable.) Let’s master boundaries in our current episode of GrooveTV. Press PLAY already. You’re in charge of you, remember? Read More

How to put the passion back into your life.

By Figure It Out, Get Your Groove Back 6 Comments

When was the last time you felt passionate?

I’m not talking about sexual passion. (Though that’s what most people think about when the word is used.) I’m talking life passion. When you have passion in your life, you wake up excited about the day ahead of you, and you take on projects with enthusiasm. With passion in your heart, you become the girl who goes for it. (Even when you’re going for daunting or difficult things.)

A passionate you is a powerful you, but if you’re like most women, you probably haven’t felt the fire in a long time. (It’s tough to feel passionate when you’re drowning in your own life, isn’t it?) If you’re deep in the drowning part right now, you may doubt that passion is possible for you, but that’s not true.

Passion is possible for you, and you can claim it today. (I promise it’s true. Keep reading.)

The topic of passion itself can feel tough to grasp. What’s the big deal anyway? Who cares if you have it? What difference does it make? The thing is, it can make a pretty big difference. You see, a life without passion can turn you into a member of the Walking Dead. (In case you haven’t watched the popular show, those are flesh-eating zombies I’m referring to. Super fun to watch on TV. Super stinky to live like one.)

If you’re stuck in zombie land, living on autopilot, going through the motions, and just trying to make it through the day, this blog is for you. A life without passion is a life without joy. You deserve so much better than that. Let’s go claim your better right now, okay? In our current episode of GrooveTV we’re gonna create your very own passion formula. Press PLAY already. Let’s light your fire. It’s time.

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How To Ditch The Drama In Your Life

By Catch Breath, Get Your Groove Back One Comment

If your life isn’t working the way you want it to, there’s a pretty good bet you’re part of the problem. I know that sounds harsh, but I’m here to give it to you straight. So let’s talk straight.

If you’re doing drama, you’re creating problems in your life that don’t need to be there. Drama drains your life force. At its essence, drama is a distraction. It asks you to focus on things that don’t matter, creates emotional turmoil, and feeds off of your energy like a parasite. (Gross, right?)

Drama is a self-inflicted wound. It’s also an addictive cycle that keeps you depleted, stuck, and spinning around in a dark little vortex, feeling sorry for yourself, making people uncomfortable, and destroying your dreams.

I want you to stop it. (For real. Knock it off. You’re better than that.)

I wish I could tell you I know so much about drama because I’m a life coach. (And that does help.) But the truth of the matter is a little more uncomfortable than that. I know drama because I used do drama. (On like an epic scale.)

Because I’ve lived the drama cycle, I know that it does much more than just keep you stuck. Drama HURTS. When you’re in it, you feel anxious, unhinged, angry, and upset. You obsess. You stew. You play out little scenes in your mind where you really let so-and-so have it. (I used to run movies in my head.) At times it can even feel like you’re coming out of your own skin.

You don’t have to feel this way anymore.

Empowered women don’t do drama. You’re on the path to becoming an empowered woman, so let’s ditch that drama of yours, okay? In this week’s episode of GrooveTV I’m gonna show you how in 3 simple steps. Press PLAY already, and leave your drama in the dust. (Seriously, can you hear Mary J?) Read More